Growing up in the inner city, the hood as it’s called today, I would analyze things eight ways to Sunday. I guess you’d call it survival instinct.
Everyone, so it seems, was looking for an angle. Looking for an edge. Looking to get out of the projects and create a better life.
As I moved into my sales career selling personal computers, then bigger pieces of hardware, CAD/CAM software for design, and then large bank ERP applications, it was my job to anticipate, manipulate, and put myself in the best position to win the deal.
Sales at times can be a messy game. Survival goes with the territory. Make your quota or else you find yourself out of work looking for another gig.
So, as far back as I can remember, I’ve been in survival mode.
My brain was wired to being attached to a specific outcome. And, my emotional compass would easily be triggered to feel happy, sad, or frustrated depending on situational circumstances.
I’m a much different man today.
Don’t misunderstand. I still have dreams, hopes, and aspirations like anyone else.
The difference in me now is fourfold:
- I have a conviction about who I want to become
- I’m not attached to the hip of a specific outcome
- I take consistent daily actions towards my endgame
- I simply let things be
This different way of thinking allows me to be more in control without all the emotional baggage of being in survival mode.
I came across this story. Some attribute it to being a Zen fable others have said it’s roots are Taoist.
Nevertheless, it’s a simple parable that delivers a laser like message.
A farmer had only one horse. One day, his horse ran away.
His neighbors said, “I’m so sorry. This is such bad news. You must be so upset.”
The man just said, “We’ll see.”
A few days later, his horse came back with twenty wild horses following. The man and his son corralled all 21 horses.
His neighbors said, “Congratulations! This is such good news. You must be so happy!”
The man just said, “We’ll see.”
One of the wild horses kicked the man’s only son, breaking both his legs.
His neighbors said, “I’m so sorry. This is such bad news. You must be so upset.”
The man just said, “We’ll see.”
The country went to war, and every able-bodied young man was drafted to fight. The war was terrible and killed every young man, but the farmer’s son was spared, since his broken legs prevented him from being drafted.
His neighbors said, “Congratulations! This is such good news. You must be so happy!”
The man just said, “We’ll see.”
Great post and good story also. I’m nowhere close to this but I work towards it as often as I can. Ah yes, mindful peace would be a nice thing… one of these days… lol
Thanks Mitch. I think we’re all a work in progress.
Mindful peace. Those two words are calming.